Abbott and Costello: Episode Transcripts
135 transcribed episodes of Abbott and Costello, 1942–1952, in air-date order. Open one to read the transcript and play from any line, or listen to Abbott and Costello free, live around the clock.
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- Christmas 1952 · 9:07
- Bank Robbery with Marlene Dietrich October 15, 1942 · 29:42
- Knights in Shining Armor with Merle Oberon November 19, 1942 · 29:52
- Hunting Guide with Claire Trevor January 14, 1943 · 29:12
- Guest Lana Turner November 4, 1943 · 28:00
- Nylon Stockings with Lucille Ball November 18, 1943 · 29:49
- Costello's Pet Turkey with Jane Wyman November 25, 1943 · 29:22
- Trip to Palm Springs with Veronica Lake December 2, 1943 · 59:37
- English Butler with Arthur Treacher December 9, 1943 · 29:35
- The Wild West With Lynn Bari December 16, 1943 · 28:42
- The Lawyer With Bert Gordon December 30, 1943 · 29:15
- Lou's Engaged to Judy Canova January 6, 1944 · 29:13
- A Visit To Peter Lorres Sanitarium January 13, 1944 · 24:28
- A Visit To Peter Lorres Sanitariumafrs January 13, 1944 · 29:25
- Football Game With Harold Peary January 20, 1944 · 25:59
- Playing The Piano With Janet Blair January 27, 1944 · 29:58
- Robinson Crusoe With Charles Laughton February 10, 1944 · 29:51
- Making A Movie With Dorothy Lamour February 17, 1944 · 27:29
- Running A Newspaper With Hedda Hopper March 2, 1944 · 29:13
- Missing Script With Blondie And Dagwood March 9, 1944 · 28:17
- At The Circus With Alan Hale March 16, 1944 · 29:07
- A Psychiatrist For Costello With Linda Darnell March 23, 1944 · 28:30
- Radio Station With Alan Ladd March 30, 1944 · 28:52
- Guest-Cary Grant April 6, 1944 · 28:24
- Date With Connie Haines May 4, 1944 · 28:49
- Job At A Department Store With Claire Trevor May 11, 1944 · 28:44
- Costello Buys Gifts For Castafrs June 8, 1944 · 29:44
- Investment Adviceafrs October 5, 1944 · 31:01
- Investing In A Gold Mine October 12, 1944 · 29:46
- Lou Goes To Jail October 19, 1944 · 30:24
- Matrimonial Agency October 26, 1944 · 29:36
- Mortimers Pet Shop November 2, 1944 · 24:42
- Lous Race Horse Peanut Butter November 9, 1944 · 25:36
- Return To P.s.15 November 16, 1944 · 29:25
- Formal Thanksgiving Dinner November 23, 1944 · 27:00
- The Bank Robberyafrs November 30, 1944 · 30:26
- Visit To Tin Pan Alley December 7, 1944 · 29:09
- Christmas Shopping For Lous Girlfriend December 14, 1944 · 29:03
- Christmas Party December 21, 1944 · 30:00
- Lous House Needs Another Bathtub January 11, 1945 · 30:00
- Hertz You Drive January 18, 1945 · 29:49
- Lou Wants To Join The Merchant Marines January 25, 1945 · 29:40
- The Merchant Marinesafrs January 25, 1945 · 29:57
- Lou Shoots An Orange Picker February 1, 1945 · 57:42
- Jack And The Beanstalkafrs February 15, 1945 · 28:57
- Guest-Frank Sinatra March 1, 1945 · 28:12
- New Press Agent March 8, 1945 · 21:29
- Basic Training March 22, 1945 · 29:38
- Trying To Hire The Andrews Sisters April 5, 1945 · 30:27
- Charm School April 19, 1945 · 29:30
- Making A Movie With The Andrews Sisters April 26, 1945 · 29:52
- Spanish Acting School May 3, 1945 · 29:01
- Spanish Acting Schoolafrs May 3, 1945 · 29:56
- Costello Gets A Tattooafrs June 7, 1945 · 29:08
- Costellos Fathers Day Giftafrs June 14, 1945 · 29:19
- Bud And Lou Are In A Playafrs June 21, 1945 · 29:22
- Return To Paterson June 28, 1945 · 30:35
- Lou Promises His Girlfriend A Job October 4, 1945 · 29:46
- Latin-american Party November 1, 1945 · 29:15
- Lou Hides From His Girlfriend November 15, 1945 · 24:55
- Opening A Gas Station November 29, 1945 · 29:00
- Lou The Fireman December 6, 1945 · 29:11
- Melonheads Department Store December 13, 1945 · 29:38
- Lous Christmas Party December 20, 1945 · 30:10
- Costellos Beauty Shop December 27, 1945 · 30:02
- Working In Melonheads Restaurantafrs January 24, 1946 · 30:25
- Looking For An Apartment February 7, 1946 · 28:41
- Mrs.Niles Gives The Boys A Job February 14, 1946 · 26:44
- Costello Looking For A Leading Lady For His New Play February 21, 1946 · 29:38
- Lou Discovers Uranium March 7, 1946 · 29:41
- Lou Has To Pay Income Tax March 14, 1946 · 29:01
- Lous Sister Is Getting Marriedafrs March 28, 1946 · 29:57
- Lou Is Working In The Garden April 11, 1946 · 29:50
- Pet Shop April 18, 1946 · 29:35
- The Sheriff Of North Hollywood April 25, 1946 · 24:45
- Napoleon And Josephine May 2, 1946 · 29:40
- Lou Wants To Join The Circus May 9, 1946 · 29:30
- Costello Runs For Mayor May 16, 1946 · 29:37
- Preparing For Elsa Maxwells Party May 30, 1946 · 29:35
- Bud And Lou Need Some Dough June 6, 1946 · 29:50
- The Lewis-conn Fightafrs June 20, 1946 · 30:19
- Abbotts Big Dateafrs June 27, 1946 · 29:38
- Incorrigible October 3, 1946 · 29:31
- Lou Is Hallucinating October 10, 1946 · 29:42
- Lion Hunting Trip December 5, 1946 · 29:03
- Costello The Air Hero December 12, 1946 · 29:00
- From New York City Again February 6, 1947 · 27:56
- Costello Buys A Boat February 13, 1947 · 29:35
- Ski Jump February 20, 1947 · 29:26
- Driving Lessons With Marilyn Maxwell February 27, 1947 · 29:52
- Talking About Paying Income Tax March 6, 1947 · 29:46
- Lou Goes To The Racetrack To Lose Money March 13, 1947 · 29:42
- Hanley Stafford Subs For Bud Abbott March 20, 1947 · 29:58
- Stock Market March 27, 1947 · 29:18
- Nuts And Bolts April 10, 1947 · 29:35
- Costello Is Invited To Join The Yankees April 17, 1947 · 28:53
- Lou Builds A House April 24, 1947 · 29:48
- Night In Haunted House May 8, 1947 · 30:02
- Night In Haunted Houseafrs May 8, 1947 · 26:34
- Lou Wants To Marry Marilyn May 22, 1947 · 29:51
- First Show For Abc October 1, 1947 · 29:51
- Lou Wants To Open A Bank Account December 10, 1947 · 28:50
- Christmas Program December 24, 1947 · 29:15
- New Years Eve December 31, 1947 · 28:06
- Lou Wants To Be An Actor January 7, 1948 · 29:22
- Guest-Arthur Lake January 10, 1948 · 29:47
- Lou Buys An Apartment House January 14, 1948 · 29:24
- Lou Inherits Eight Hundred Thousand Dollars January 21, 1948 · 28:58
- Guest-Erskine Johnson January 28, 1948 · 29:15
- Guest-Norma Jean Nilsson January 31, 1948 · 30:00
- Lou Inherits The Largest Diamond In The World February 4, 1948 · 29:21
- The Boys Buy A Ranch February 11, 1948 · 29:43
- Make A Picture February 25, 1948 · 29:05
- Uncle Mikes Gold Mine March 3, 1948 · 21:06
- Lou Becomes AT-man March 31, 1948 · 24:35
- Lou Is Not Feeling Well April 7, 1948 · 30:36
- Lou Is Not Feeling Wellafrs April 7, 1948 · 29:28
- Bud And Lou Plan To Go To France April 14, 1948 · 29:31
- Opening A Marriage Bureau April 21, 1948 · 29:23
- Costello Looking For A Job April 28, 1948 · 29:20
- The New Sheriff With Bela Lugosi May 5, 1948 · 29:06
- Bud And Lou Get The Ratings Of Their Show May 12, 1948 · 29:25
- Costellos Race Horse Peanut Butter May 19, 1948 · 30:29
- Costello Joins The Foreign Legion May 26, 1948 · 26:18
- Guest-Lon Chaney Jr June 2, 1948 · 28:40
- Guest-Benny Rubin June 16, 1948 · 29:48
- Bud And Lou Plan A Vacation July 7, 1948 · 25:43
- Lou Learns To Swim July 28, 1948 · 30:32
- Lou Gets A Job Offer From The Un August 11, 1948 · 29:46
- Double Murder At The Liquor Distillery September 8, 1948 · 24:49
- Guest-Red Ryder September 11, 1948 · 29:16
- The Fish Market Murder September 23, 1948 · 29:40
- Thanksgiving Show November 25, 1948 · 29:50
- Guest-Larry Stevens December 11, 1948 · 28:34
- Guest-Lillian Roth December 18, 1948 · 28:53