Lou Learns To Swim

Hey, Evan, what time is it? It's time for the Evan Costello Show. We're on the air for ABC here in Hollywood. Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go with the Evan Costello Show! Yes, it's the Evan Costello Show.

We're doing some transcribing Hollywood tonight for your listening pleasure with Susan Miller and Maddy Mallegs Orchestra. It's all, hold on to your chairs, folks. Here they are, but Evan and whoa, Costello! Alright, alright, stop all that yelling.

Where did you get that new car in the parking lot? Ah, what if I'm a old lady, a special need? $500 on a bonus. You had to give the old lady a bonus? Yeah. What was it?

An old man. An old... Cocksets, will you, Lou? Say, by the way, why is your uncle Mike going over to that water cooler so much? He's drinking a gallon of water. Happened, I never saw a man as thirsty as uncle Mike.

He drinks about 10 gallons of water a day. Then at night he goes in a living room, sits down in his favorite rocking chair. And then what does he do? He just sits there in rocks and slutches.

The hell? Hey, maybe it's because your uncle Mike's sail on the ocean for so many years. He's sail all around the world, isn't he? Oh, yes, yes indeed. Yes. He got a lot of souvenirs too, Abbott.

He did. He's got a diamond from South Africa, a jade necklace from China, a whale bone sword from Alaska, and a hula skirt from a wire. Wait a minute, where did he get that shrunken head? That's the barber's fault.

He keeps putting those darn hot towels on him. Castell, I think you're a nitty-in. I think upon him? I actually think you're a nitty-in. You can't say that about me, Abbott. My family dates back to the pilgrims.