Christmas Program

Hey, what time is it? It's time for the Abbot and Costello show. We're on the air for ABC here in Hollywood. Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go with the Abbot and Costello show!

Yes, it's the new Transcribed Abbot and Costello show with their new thinking discovery to the Miller and Matty Mal, they talk us through it. So hold on to your chairs, folks, for here they are, Bud Abbot and Luke Costello!

All right, Costello. Look at you. You're all messed up. Where have you been? Well, I was doing some last minute shopping. I bought a dress for a maid. The sales lady asked me to slip it on for size.

And before I could get her off, I was dancing with three sailors at the palladium. Now, did you remember to get that clock for our producer? Yeah, I got him at Dandy Clock. Kugoo? Yeah, he's a little nuts.

No, no. Never mind that. Did you hit it? Get that box of artificial snow. What's your language, Abbott? Artificial snow? In California, we call that stuff Miami Mist. Did you find out what the rest of the people on the show wanted, Lou?

Yes, I'll announce I want to pipe a leather jacket and a gallon of gin, but he says you won't be mad if you don't get the pipe and I'll other jacket Did you get the presents for Maddie at Malick like I told you to? Oh, yeah, I got the five girls waiting up in the hall

Girls I told you to get five shirts for Miley. Oh, I thought you said skirts now What would Maddie do with five girls don't mind them folks. She's getting a polo stick for Christmas And I also got some misletoe You don't even know what Miss and Co is.