Guest-Benny Rubin

Hey, Abbott, what time is it? It's time for the Abbott and Costello show. We're on the air for ABC here in Hollywood. Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go with the Abbott and Costello show.

Yes, it's the Abbott and Costello show. Producing transcribed Hollywood tonight for you. Listen in place. You're with Susan Miller and the music of Matty Malley. Hold on to your tears, folks. Here they are.

Put Abbott and Luke Costello. All right, Costello. All right, all right. Stop the yelling. Say, where did you get that black eye? A girl. What happened? I popped the question and she popped me back.

Why did she pop you back? Wrong question. I... Cassella, you've got to have one backbone with girls. When you with a girl, assert yourself. What do you mean? Well, just say, look, babe, either you do what I want you to do or go jump in the lake.

I tried that. What happened? Last week, they pulled six girls out of the lake. I don't take me, for instance. I'm very popular with a girl. Oh, yeah? So, remember the girls at the Glendale Laundry?

Yes, they voted you the guy they would most like to mangle. That was Mango, not Mango, but remember, Costella, back in Madison. And the girls got us to join the Patterson Bowling and Necking Society.

Yes, we ought to go back there sometime and do a little bowling. Well, I got to leave you now, Abbot. I'm running for door catcher and grand deal. I've got to write out a speech.

You were running for public office. What do you know about politics? Well, I'm back in the Jersey area for state senator once, but my opponent made a wonderful speech. I promised every voter $60 a month, and he was elected 3,000 for nothing.