Life with Luigi: Luigi Joins Hospital Plan

From Chicago, we invite you to enjoy life. Life with Luigi, a new comedy show created by Sigh Howard, and starring Jay Carol Nash with Alan Reid. A year ago, when Luigi Vasco left Italy to start his new life in America, he promised his mother that he would write her and tell her about his adventures.

So now, we look over Luigi's shoulder as he writes another letter to Mama Vasco in Italy. Dear Mamma Mia is now big shopping season in America. Everywhere I sign, news and papers and radio, they tell people there is only 24 shopping a day till Christmas.

Mamma Mia, with the money I got, I can do all my Christmas shopping in the 24 minutes. Laughter Streets is filled with excited people rushing to buy things. In Chicago, mainly shopping section is called the Loop.

I guess that's because everybody run around in a circle. The apartment stores even have a door which you run around in a circle. It's called revolving door. People walk in and the door walk in with them.

There's also many other wonderful things like an old country when a man wants to go to second floor. He walks upstairs. In a department store, Man who stands still and stares a walk up. Yes, ma'am, ma'am, everybody here getting ready to celebrate the Christmas.

Except for Squally, my countryman, who bring me to America. Only celebration he wants is for me to marry as a daughter Rosa. And, ma'am, that Rosa is so fat. If she ever stand on the street for five minutes, a minute's policeman give her ticket for double parking. Anyway, this morning I open up my antique store and I'm talking with my 12-year-old general manager Jimmy

O'Connor who's a like a son to me and Jimmy he's saying, Hey boss, here's the mail. Is a letter from my mama? Not today boss. Then who write to me? There's quite a few here. Is a wonderful country. I don't write anybody but I get answers anyway. Today is the 30th. It's the end of the month. So what? It happened 12

times a year. Like on Copietro say, everything has end except sausage. Sausage has to end. But tomorrow is the first, so the bills come in today. Is it too bad the month don't stand on a fifth? Then we have more time to pay bills.

With the money we haven't got it won't make much difference. Some day I pay. Right now we keep record. I write on a page, bills are standing out. Bill's outstanding. Okay, read the bill. It's from the Edison company.

It's a pleasure to hear from Mr. Edison. Fine, man. Electric light is a wonderful invention. If Edison don't invent electric light, that is an accompanying order business. How much we owe Mr. Edison? Four dollars and thirty-eight cents.

Is what the money I'm gonna owe them? If you don't pay, they'll turn off the juice. Then we'll use candles, like an old country. If we do, then this place is sure gonna be spooky.

All these old statues and old furniture, candles? In all days, everybody used candles. Even Abraham Lincoln. He was a poor fella Jimmy. He lived in a large cabin, walked every day to school in a snow, working a store just like you, and then a study at the night by candle.

And then he become a president. That's getting you the White House the hard way. Even hard, the Lincoln was a Republican. What's next bill Jimmy? Yes, $4.12. Maybe we better cut down on our cooking.

From now on we boil three minute eggs in two minutes. Guess how much the telephone bill is. Three dollars? Try again. Four dollars. You hit the bell? I think a Mr. Bell hit me. Just the same as a wonderful intervention.

If there's no telephone, then there's no telephone or books. What the little kid sit on when they want a haircut? What are you going to do with these bills? What do we have money with pay?

Aren't you worried? Here's a noise everybody worrying with Jimmy. Right, then I let the companies worry. But what are you going to do, boss? I got a surprise for you, Jimmy. See? Here's the $15.

Where'd you get that? You remember all colonial letter K? Sure, of course you're 20. I sell it for $15. But boss? I get stuck when I pay twenty dollars for Jimmy. So I sell it back to same fella for fifteen.

But you lost five dollars in the deal. Oh no Jimmy. I make five dollars because it's only worth ten dollars in the first place. What's the next letter Jimmy? It's from the president of the Windy City Investment Company.

From President himself? Yep. John C. Shaw. Let me see that. Dear friend. Jimmy do I know Mr. Shaw? Oh, it doesn't mean a thing, boss. Your name is on what they call sucker lists. It's a pretty good Jimmy.

Only one of you here and already I'm on a sucker list. I wouldn't exactly call it an honor, boss. Must be Jimmy. Here's the fella I don't know. Is it giving me a chance to invest in a gold mine?

Maybe we invest a little money, huh, Jimmy? What money? Next, I'll add a Jimmy. It's from the Jackson Hospital plan. Give me, I'll rid of myself. Look, it's A here. Dear Mr. Bosco, this is a personal letter.

Believe me, Boas, there's nothing personal about it. Never mind, Jimmy. Listen to the letter. Consider this invitation from us to join. How do you like that, Jimmy? Invitation. It's just an ad, Boas. They don't mean that...

What this means? Hospital plan. They pay your hospital expenses. Of course they have to be sick, huh? Not you, please. Huh? Not you. Not you. What the natch means? Well, it's short for naturally. Please, Jimmy.

I like to learn a long English and not a short hand. How do you know about this plan? I've seen the ads and the papers, and I've heard them on the radio. They got the longest commercial.

Then why don't you not tell me? Well, boss, you can't take on any more expenses. What I'd say here only cost the two cents a day. You can't even afford that. Maybe they give a chipper if we got a sick only on a weekend.

I see about this right away. Why the hurry? Mr. Jackson say here in his letter, hurry, hurry. I hurry. Mr. Loweens. You watch your story, Jimmy. I go see Mr. Jackson. America, I love you.

You like a pappa? Loweens, you're my friend. Hello, Loweens. Hello, Allah. Hello, Pascuali. I'm in a big hurry. All the way to see you in a big hurry. Not always, Pascuali. Only when I see you.

Where you going this time? To the hospital. Who's the sick? I find out later. You talk, but you know make a sense, Luigi. Speak and play. I explain to you, Pascal. See this? Show is a letter.

No, it's invitation. Invitation to what? Invitation to hospital. That's a nice invitation. I'm here 26 years. I never hear of an invitation to a hospital. Wait, I explain. Is invitation for a hospital insurance plan for two cents?

Luigi, why you always a sticky, your two cents and everything. All the time you run around and run around like little mouse. Is it called Jackson a plan? Luigi, why you gotta be different from other people? Why you must join a Jackson a plan?

Join a Marshall a plan. If you seek Jackson take care of the whole thing for two cents a day. Ah, it's stupid. When a fella gets a sick two cents a day, it's not gonna help him a much.

What's a happen if it's a rain in a some day and you know can run to the mailbox and send the Jackson here to say this. Then there's no insurance that day. Luigi, you always buy policies. For one amount, you got a fire insurance. Is there no fire?

Thanks, time. I explain it to you a letter. If I get sick, Jackson is a fire. I explain it, Pasquale. Look what it say here in the letter. If I get a sick, Jackson a plan is pay for doctors and nurses and all kinds of sickening.

They pay for everything except the maternity. Why? Is it contagious? Pasquale, you know understand. I'm understand the plenty but what's the If I'm gonna catch you this opportunity. Is not the possible. Maternity is meaning having a little bambino.

Oh, that's so fine. I tell you what you do. Forget it, it's a crazy two-sense hospital. Marry my roster. She's a have a bambino. I pay you two cents a day for the rest of your life.

Please, the posqually. We're not to talk about the roster. Wait, talk about a roster, I'm breaking your arm. That's Guali. How is the roster? I'm glad you asked, my son. Luigi, you couldn't have found a knife to go.

Or a bigger. It's not thing my roster can do, she's got a lot of talent. What the kind of talent? Oh, she's a wonder. She's a first class of cook, she's a handywood and needle, she's a washer, better than the laundry, and she's a keeper house that needs to like a payment.

You know Pasquale? Yes, my son. I bet you Rosalie could have found a good job someplace. Luigi, I don't like you, sense you, especially when my Rosalie is a crazy for you. Is it too bad, Pasquale?

Right now, she's a feeling very bad, and she's got a broken heart. Maybe she joined a two-sense hospital. If there's no hospital, you're for her, only you, Luigi. You the doctor. If I'm the doctor, I go find the new patient.

Oh, Luigi, you get me so mad, I think I'm gonna break you in a little bit of pieces. Then I better go join a Jackson to plan a quick. Excuse me lady, is this Jackson hospital plan?

Yes. I like to speak to Andrew. What's the nature of your business? Antique business, 21 North Holsters Creek, open night and day in the office. What can I do for you? I get the letter this morning.

I like to join two cents of their hospital plan. Oh, you want to see Mr. McRady? First order, you're right. Thank you lady. Come in. Hello. Girl outside, she tells me you are Mr. McRady.

She says you can't tell me all about Jackson and her hospital plan. I beg your a due. You see Mr. McCready, I'm not along in this country and it's harder for me to understand everything it says in a little book about a hospital plan.

So maybe you are displaying some of the things that it says. I beg your a due. It says that you're not physical examination is unnecessary. I guess if there's no examination necessary means I don't have to see a doctor.

Well, go ahead you explain to me. Another thing it is say here you have a choice of a 90 member hospital That means I go to any hospital. I like well there are 90 hospitals It's so wonderful how simple is everything the way you explain it it is say here Also say here if I marry plan also cover my wife if I ever marry rosy

There's a no plan to big enough to cover high But I have a little boy Jimmy. Is it good for him, huh? Yes. Thank you so much, Mr. Macarete. You speak a beautiful English. Here's my two cents.

I ain't rolling a plan. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Gee, I'm sorry, Mr. Oh, I hit to my fault. I don't look where I'm going. Are you hurt? No, but maybe I hurt you, car. Are you sure you're all right?

I feel fine. You can't beat who to oh, Mr. Basko. Mr. Macarete. What are you doing here? Right, on the job, Mr. Basko, the Jackson Hospital Plan will take care of everything. Yes, sir, there's a room, nurse, a choice of any one of 1,000 doctors already waiting for you.

Pomma mia, all for two cents! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! While you're wondering what Luigi is going to do next, I have a $16,000 announcement for you about CBS's popular quiz program, Hit the Jackpot.

Later tonight, $16,000 worth of breathtaking prizes will be given to the lucky contestant at home or in the studio who can give the correct solution to the secret sentence. MC Bill Cullen will give you more clues to help you solve the secret sentence.

For fun and prizes, be sure to tune in Hit the Jackpot tonight over most of these same CBS network stations. Now for the second act of Luigi Vasco's adventures in Chicago, we turn to page two of his letter to his mother in Italy.

So, Mamma Mia, I never think when I go to join a hospital plan that five minutes later I'm in a hospital. This gives you idea of a kind of quick service if I'll get to America.

So now I'm in a hospital only because I'm reading a hospital advertisement book when I cross the street and I don't see the card. But don't worry, Mamma Mia. It's absolutely nothing wrong with me.

Only trouble is that nobody believes in me. It's a very nice and nice to hear. She takes my pulse. It's first American girl who hold my hand. It's a very pleasant Mamma Mia. But now Jimmy visits to me and he says, Boss, hello Jimmy.

What a rush down here as soon as I heard about it. It's all over the neighborhood. I feel fine, Jimmy. What happened, boss? I'm walking across the state street. When suddenly I hit automobile. Did you get the license?

No, just a piece of a right to front fender. Where were you hurt, boss? In a safety zone. What are you doing on stage street? If I tell you, you'll be angry with me, Jimmy.

Oh, I'm not going to be angry, boss. I go see Jackson Hospital plan. Then I have accident after I join. Please, Jimmy, do something for me. I just don't know to my teacher misfolding. I know I can come to school tonight.

Sam is all right for you. Well, I can tell him, Mr. Luigi, you don't have to write a note. No, Jimmy, is the better you're right. Please excuse my parents. Luigi Bosco from the school tonight.

You're the truly Jimmy O'Connor. Well, if that's the way you want it, someone's here to see you, boss. Oh, he's a man of from a two-centre hospital plan. Well, goodbye, boss. I'll see you later.

Okay, good-bye, Jimmy. Mr. Basko, I take my hat off to you. Thank you, you're very polite. Yes, sir, you sure are a fast worker. We're going to make a big thing out of this. Imagine a man signs up for the Jackson Hospital plan, and five minutes later he's in the hospital.

Why, it'll make us the talk of the country. You're not angry with me? Angry, certainly not. On the contrary, we'll see to it that you'll get every operation that's coming to you. You'll get, you'll get tonsils, adenoids, appendix, and that's only the start.

Sounds like a lack of the finish. Please, I'm feeling fine. I want to go home. Mr. Basko, you gave us your two cents. You enrolled. We have your signature. You agreed to accept our benefits and you'll get your benefit.

Please, I just want to go home. You stay right there. Don't move to the Hill from us. You're in a soft, comfortable hospital bed. You'll get the best of doctors and nurses for two cents a day.

You're entitled to all this for 21 days. Live, ma'am. Live. Luigi, you sleep in my sound. Ho pascuali. I'm even a glad to see you. How you feel, my little man? I feel fine pascuali, but...

Don't talk, Luigi. Here, drink a little soup. A rosus. He cook it a special for you. That's a nice. It's a love, an ever-spoon of full Luigi. She's put her heart in it. Taste the like it.

Luigi, I'm already take care of everything. take for you then when can I go home take it easy lawyer says you're critical sicker man lawyer I don't even see lawyer how he knows he knows but the pascualia I don't need lawyer never see a fellow like you even when you're sick you argue if a lawyer says you say it can you say but I'm not sick I'm a fine I

don't care what do you say I already give a lawyer fifty thousand dollars fifty I gave him. He's saying we're going to collect. I never have a fifty thousand dollars. But the lawyer I gave a fifty dollars to, he's saying we're going to collect the tenor thousand. We? Sure we. Is it your accident? So I make you a partner. Next time if I have

accident I make you a partner to. It's a pharix chain. Thank you Pascuali, but there's nothing wrong with me. Lawyer is out the side and he's telling what's wrong with you. Here There is a Mr. Sykes, you lawyer, Louis.

How I am, Mr. Basko? I'm fine. Delirious, eh, Pascuali? Sounds alike. And I will, don't try to talk, Mr. Basko. You're a very sick man. Just leave everything to me. I don't. I'll leave it to my mama.

Uh, I will shoot that car owner for every penny as in the world. We'll strip and clean. We'll take the clothes off us back. You haven't a thing to worry about with John Sykes as you're attending.

I'm worried about other fella. Oh, I've had lots of cases like this, but I'm chasing every one just all my life. You must be pretty tired. Mr. Bosco, I saw the whole thing. You did?

Why certainly I did. There was this car coming in a very northery direction at approximately 75 miles an hour. You were standing in the safeties. But I was in the office. Darling, you're up please.

Suddenly this automobile swerved. Knock you down. Ran over you. Backed up. And ran over you again. No, no, no. No, Mr. Sykes. It was all my fault. I crossed the window like it was red.

What's that got to do with it, aren't you entitled to your choice of colors? Sure. Sure, Louis. So, Luigi, everybody's got to write to choose a color. Don't worry, we're going to collect the plenty.

Pasquale, you got a hit by cartoon? I'm just a look out of your interest, but I feel fine. I don't even hurt a little bit. You see, Pasquale? Brain concussion. Looks alike. How was the basket gold?

Where were you in the night of July 21, 1928? July 21, 1928. I don't remember. Ah-ha! Amnesia. Magnesia. Oh, it's even worse than I feared. I'll tell me, Mr. Basko, do you hear ticking noises?

Basko, I'll take you what you're watching away from my ear. All I can say is, Mr. Basko, that you're a mighty sick man. Yes, sir, mighty sick. Please, Mr. Sykes, you'll give me a headache.

Fine, don't fight it, Mr. Basko. And my back is hurting from laying in bed. Ah, wonderful, wonderful. Now you're talking. But I feel fine. Stop saying that. Sayin' that! I'll keep him quiet, Pasquale, I'll be back in a moment.

Pasquale, I don't trust Mr. Sykes. I'm a surprise to you, Luigi. Mr. Sykes is as honest as I am. That's what worries me. No, Pasquale. I don't sue other fella. It's not honest. I don't want it to go home.

Look, Luigi, you don't worry about this. All you think about is your health. I worry about your money. Hey, lay down a Luigi is a doctor. Well, how are you feeling, Mr. Bus? Come and feel it, Mr. Bus?

You're so good, a doctor. Excuse me, I'd like to look at the chart. Show a doctor here. What does it say? Mmm, sounds bad. Is... is a bad doctor? Temperature. Mmm. Blood pressure. Mmm. Has he got a temperature and a blood pressure?

And these x-rays Woooooo X-rays Well, but, but, I'm feeling the fire Stop arguing with the doctor You'll excuse me Mr. Bosco. I'll be back Pusquale I hear you, Luigi What? What a doctor mean when he say Mmm Don't sound good to me, Luigi Hey Luigi, hold my hand.

Pasquale, you see x-ray pictures? Is all black? Is there nothing left inside? What a say on chart. I'm not supposed to tell you Luigi. Please, please, Pasquale is better if I know everything. Alright, alright, I tell.

Temperature 98 to period of six. I've said not to too good. Please, Pascuali, if anything happened, you take care of Jim. Sure, sure, I even adopt him. And when he grow up, don't make him marry Rosie.

Luigi, Rosie's always going to be true to one man, you, Luigi. He's all right with me if she lie a little. Listen to Pascuali. He's the one more thing. In the four years from now, I get to my citizen issue, paper.

Can you hear me, Pasquale? I hear you, Luigi. I give you permission to vote for me. Anything else? I wait until the doctor comes back before I make a more promises. All right, tell Luigi.

Now I tell you what I going to do for you. When I'm collecting money from accident, I'm going to take your share, and I'm going to build a new antique store with a yo statue in the front.

With a big sign in the Your Honor, Luigi Bosco Spagari Palace. Why Spagari in Antique Store? Gotta pay expenses, Luigi. Pasquale is suddenly getting very dark. All about to my hands, Luigi, my friend. Maybe now you do something for me, eh?

Anything. Maybe you see Rosie, just the one from all, right? Is it dark enough already? There is he making a difference Luigi you're gonna die anyway? Marry Rosa. This make her happy, pascal. Sure, sure.

To make her the happiest widow in Chicago. All right. Rosa, what is she? She's just a half-minute to be waiting outside. Rosa, say hello to poor Luigi. Hello, Rosa. Luigi's a dying.

And before he goes he wants to marry you, Rose, so what are you thinking at? Shut up your face. Luigi, I go bring you to judge. Is the judge also happening to be waiting outside?

What's going on here? Doctor, you're just in the time. Everything is dark. No wonder someone turned off the light. Who would have do a thing like this? I see everything now. Doctor, I'm not the dine, huh?

Not for a long time to come, Mr. Bosco. There is the thing in the world, the matter with you. Get your clothes and go home. You hear that, Pascuali? Doctor, you sure? Of course. It's impossible, Doctor.

I just give a lawyer $50, and Luigi's got to die. I feel fine. I'm going to leave the hospital. I got to my two cents towards this. Pascuali, I'm going to back to the store.

Wait, Tilluigi. You promised it to Mary Rosie. Oh, no. I already have my accident for today. So, Mamma Mia, now if I get sick, is nothing to worry about, because I get sick in America.

You are loving a son, Luigi. Be sure to listen next week at the same time over most of these stations when Luigi Vasco writes another letter to Mama Vasco describing his adventures in America. Late with Luigi is a Sighowered production and is written by High Craft and Sighowered and stars J. Carol Nash as Luigi Vasco with Alan Reed as Bespasquale.

Music is under the direction of Wilbur Hatch. Ladies and gentlemen, have you heard about Cair's new holiday package? It's ration-free, it's economical, and it's guaranteed to arrive safely all for the special rate of fifteen dollars.

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Indicate plainly the address to which you wish the parcel mailed. Remember this special holiday package is only $15 with guaranteed delivery. The address again Care, C-A-R-E, New York City, New York. Later tonight on CVS, comedian Moriamsterdam has a hilarious battle with gangster Knuckles Callahan, who is determined to strong arm the hapless Moray into giving him control of his

cafe. For a solid half hour of laps, listen to the Moray Amsterdam show later tonight over most of these same CBS network stations. Bob Le Mans speaking. This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System.