Fibber McGee and Molly: Getting Rid Of Old Suit

The Johnson Wikes program with Fibber McGee and Molly. The makers of Johnson's Wikes and Johnson's self-polishing blowcoat present Marion and Jim Jordan as Fibber McGee and Molly with Jimmy Shields, Bill Thompson and Billy Mills Orchestra.

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The Sir, if there's one thing worse than having an old suitor hanging around the house for years, it's having an old suit hanging around. So here in the living room at 79 West Provista, intently reading the paper while his wife is telling him he must throw out his old blue surge and with me they're paying any

attention to the other we find favor McGee and Molly Joe DiMaggio still a hold-up how many times have I told you to throw this old suit away Maggie this is the sixth time DiMaggio has turned on the contract there's no use keeping it to see that the pants is all gone I'll just sit here at home then says Joe

go and meet my turn see where's the weather forecast have you ever looked in I don't need pockets, McGinan. Oh, it's a foregone conclusion that there will be no change. The weather forecasted really quick.

And I know that the pants won't pick you. Local corporation expands. I don't know how you'd expect to get into them. By adding seven vice presidents. I'm not going to say any of mine. McGin, you're hopeless.

You're perfectly right, Molly. What did you say? I want you to throw this old suit away. Why, of course, I be glad. What? Throw away my lucky blue, sir. I'm so lucky about it. Well, I don't you remember, Molly?

I won that suit on a punch board. I punched out your name. Oh, that's right. You know. And I remember how proud I was the first time you wore it. That was the night we went out dancing and won the Charleston contest.

Yeah. And you recall the prize they gave us? Yeah. Oh, I can still see you carrying home that case in the air beer. Oh. That was bevo, Molly. I wonder whatever become a bevo. I don't know.

See, Molly, I hate to throw away this suit. Oh, now I'm a gimme a actor. Let me try it on, huh? Here, give it here. What's that? That's them bell-bottom pants. Oh, there. How does it look, Molly?

Why that suit is all in red. Oh, well, I'll admit it. Worn a little pin from having some any moths to feed. Hardly worth the effort. Now remove that suit from your carcass before those moths take you for a test flight.

All right, but Chuck's out. Why don't you throw it out in the anise? Well, throw this suit away! Why, any old clothes man will be glad to pay me something for it. Give me the phone book, will you Molly?

Here you are. Let me see. Oh, here we are. Secondhand garments. The Robinson Crusoe castaway clothing shop. If you need money over the weekend, call our man Friday. Call him now. Okay. Hello, operator. operator I want the Robinson Crusoe cast. Oh is that you Mert? I was every little thing Mert.

Your father what? Oh he came home early. What? Oh broke eh? And polluted. Oh what happened? Mert's father rushed home last night the war in the family that the water main had broke. All the water was polluted too. Hey Mert do me a favor and tell the Robinson Crusoe to send over their buyer

I've got a big deal for him. Thanks. Well, this is a big deal, dearie. All you hold is the joke, isn't it? I can't be them already. Come in. Hi, hello, Mrs. Upington. When hello, Mrs. McGee.

And Mrs. McGee. Hi, Upie. When my dear, I want you to meet my new protege. This is Maestro William Randolph Mills, the celebrated officer conductor. One of the foremost exponents of classical music in America.

Aren't you maestro? You tell him, Toots. Did you call Billy a maestro, upy? But that's cool. I always thought a maestro had to have a big shock of bushy hair. No. No, dear, you maestro is a drum major for high-brow music.

Oh, Billy qualifies as a high-brow, all right. His forehead stops just short of his back collar button. Well, it is our intention, Senor Mills and I... Senor? to make a wistful vista a center of culture by organizing a lovely concert orchestra.

What did you call it, Maestro? Professor Mel Silvercorn at Bandham, using the orchestra as a nucleus. Isn't he just marvellous? Such a savoir pair. Aw, cut it out, kid. Nice, he's so modest. And just thinks that all these years he's been hiding his legs behind a bustle.

Wow. Oh, I mean a bustle. Oh, Maestro. But anyway, I'm putting the two of you on our list of patrons for Dr. Mills' concertos. Now let me see when will that be, Doctor? Just as soon as you give me the dough to get the horns out of hot cookie.

And I... the professor's so helpless in money matters, while just a day he told me he was so pale and overdrawn at the bank that I'd have to give him a transfusion. What am I being, Doctor Silly Girl?

Yes, I think you are. Yes, I think I have the what? Well, goodbye. Come, Rondol. Okay, Abigail. Hey, Molly, you suppose Mrs. Uppington is really going for him? Well, I don't know, Derry, but she ain't doused herself with that jockey club perfume for nothing.

Hello there, daughter! Hello, Johnny! You're the folks that said for the old clothes, man! Yep, and it looks like we drew the oldest clothes, man, in town. Hey! How much did you give me for this suit here, old-timer?

Can't see it very well without my specs. Wait till I put him on. Mm. Well, I got him on and I still can't see it. Oh, what kind of a suit do you call it?

It's a blue search. Hey, guess you're right. Search must have been mighty blue when he made it, too. Pretty good, Johnny. But that ain't the way I hear it. Hey, wait a minute. Who's telling there?

Hey? Oh, well, the feller says to tell the feller, say, say, say. How's your cow bestie standing this coal spell? All right, says Tullifuller. Except this morning when I milked her, she began giving good humors.

Well, I gotta go now. Hey, old timer, what about this suit? Hey? Oh, yes. Well, I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll sell it to you for $0.50. Hey, wait a minute. You're not selling this suit? You're buying it.

Oh, no, I'm not, Johnny. Huh? Kind of suits I sell for $0.50. I don't buy. I just pick them up out of ash cans. So long, kid. MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC For a minute there, I was afraid Dick Tracy was a goner.

MUSIC Well, now for Popeye. Let's see. Oh, where you been, Molly? I should have done it myself, but I was busy. Yeah, busy with the funny papers. I was never know such a thing. I was studying the editorial page.

Go on with you. Every time Tarzan falls out of a tree, you limp for a week. Well, guys got a show of sympathy some way. Come in. Oh, hello there, little girl. Hi, mister. What is it, sis?

I'll bet you found something, I bet you. Oh, you found something? Hmm? I said you found something. Did I? You said you did. What did I find? Hmm. How do I know what you found?

Well, and how do you know I found it, hmm? Listen, sis, you said you found something. What did you find? Your blue-sared suit. My blue-sared-sud. Oh, Deb, the Deb, the dead-red luck anyway. Yeah, yeah, I found it out in the alley, I betcha.

Well, it wasn't bothering anyone out there, was it? Why did you have to bring it in? Hmm? I says, what did you bring it in for? For a dime. A dime, but I don't need it.

Jee-jee, thanks. For what? For the dime you don't need? Oh, I give up. Okay, okay, here's your dime. Okay, okay, here's your soup. I bet I know what you're going to do with that dime.

I bet you're going to buy chocolates. Oh, no, I'm not. No, yes, you are. Oh, no, I'm not. Oh, yes, you are. Oh, no, I'm not. Oh, Mickey, stop it. Well, Chuck, make her stop a two.

Let her spend the dime the way she wants to. What you gonna do with it, sis? Wanna buy some Mexican candy. Mexican candy? Sure. You gave me a Mexican dime. Well, so on with... Well, as the fat chimney sweep said when he couldn't budge, here I am stuck with the suit again.

The word is soot. Well, here I am stuck with the soot. Say, there's Mr. Wilcox coming down the street theory. Maybe he can tell us what to do with it. Oh, no, not that guy.

figure out a way to switch the conversation around to that subject. Why you do the man an in-justitude. I bet he doesn't mention Johnson's wax once. I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll bet you dollar he does.

I'll bet you dollar that he says Johnson's wax. Are you game? Alright, I'll bet you. Now hurry and call him. Okay. Oh, oh, hello. Hey, hello. Oh, hello there, river. Come in a second, will ya?

Sure. Well, hello, Molly. What's new? Well, we've got a little problem. We're trying to get rid of this old suit of McGee's. Now what would you advise? Well I'm sorry Molly, I haven't had any experience with old suits.

Now if it was an old floor or an old piece of furniture... Oh here's where I collect. I know exactly what to do. I simply apply... Johnson's wax? That's right. And after one treatment. Sure. And after one treatment, the old floor, the old table would sparkle with a fresh gleaming coat.

It would also be protected from scratches or wear. So don't forget folks, if there's a question of keeping your house looking brighter, The answer is... Johnson's wife? Right, you are. Well, say, I'm sorry I can't help you out about that suit, Phibber.

Say, look, why don't you just cut it up into small squares and sell them for pocket mirrors? Well, so long. Well, dearie, you've lost the bet. Now, okay, up. All right. Here you are. Thank you.

You're welcome. Maggie. Where did you get a hold of a dollar? Oh, I found it in your purse. I might have known. Hey, I know how we'll get rid of that suit, Molly. We'll throw it into the river. Let's get the...

Oh, Nicki Populot. Hello there, QB. Oh, hi, Nick. Oh, hi, up to you too, fisser. I'm just dooping around to see where you've been keeping my selfies wrong winter underwears. You ain't coming around my candy kitchen lately.

What's the matter? You lose your sweet toots? Toots? Toots? Well, we've been pretty busy lately. Say, you don't know how I could get rid of this old blue-served suit, do you, Nick? Sure, fissure. I got a cousin on my doctor's side who just gave a white birth to a new inventor that leakin' disms tired suits like that one.

If I do say so myself. Well, tell me about it. I'm all ears. Now, did you mention it? Yes. But my cousin, he takes a suit of closings and puts it in a cabinet where it dumps himself in steam and hot oil. Oh, for how long?

Oh, one day I saw it in there for two days. And then he puts it in a tireless cookie, and he spins it around for 50 miles in a 20-mile ozone. Oh, man, that sounds marvelous.

I'll say so. Yes. There is only one throwback to the whole deal. What's that, Nick? It don't do the shoot, it'd be good. Well, salon, fizzer, salon, Cupie, drop me a ring sometime when you're passing out.

I guess English will always be Greek to him. Well, come on, Molly, get your coat on. We're gonna take this suit down and throw it in the river. I'm gonna get rid of it. Hi, Mr. Look what I got for you this time.

Hey, where did you get all those suits, says? Who do those suits belong to? They're yours now. Muck. Why, there's five of them. What would I want five suits for? For 50 cents. 50 cents?

Yep, 10 cents a suit. Like last time, remember? Haven't I got enough trouble trying to get rid of the one suit? Where'd you get these suits? From the neighbors. From the neighbors? You sure the people didn't mind you taking them?

Oh no. They were glad to have me take them. Glad to have you take them. Sure. Every single person gave me a suit just as soon as I started to cry and tell them it was for poor old Mr. McGee.

Awesome. Folks, Jimmy Shields things careless. Love was a thing that you wanted That's why we answered love's call Now that you've got what you wanted You don't seem to want at all Now that you've got me Here listen, everything

Make a point, man And think you are If you're not careful... Where do you suppose it'll wind up? Oh, well, it'll be turned to a sridginal place in nature, Molly.

Is that so? It'll float down the river till it comes to the ocean. Oh! When it gets to the ocean, that's... Well, that's where the surge of the blue sea meets the blue surge, see?

Don't you get it, Molly? I said that. Ain't funny, Maggie. It is a little far-fetched. About 2,000 miles. Uh-oh, McGee. Huh? What's the matter? Here comes that man again. You know the one we can't think who he is?

Oh boy, no place to hide. Hey, I'm gonna find out who he is this time, Molly. Watch me lead the conversation around to where he tips us off. Well, hello there, Mr. McGee. Hello, Mrs. McGee.

How do you do? Imagine meeting you, he. Uh-huh. Bob, then. Hi. I was hoping I'd see you around someplace. You were? Why, Ma'am? Just silly one. Well, I got to thinking about you the other day.

We don't see much of each other nowadays, so I thought it'd be nice if we had a picture of you for our album. You know, with your name signed to it and everything. What, do you want another one?

You mean we already have... Oh, why, of course, Legee. How dumb of you. We already have a picture of Mr. Danny Todandy one soon. Oh, I'm sure I was just kidding. Oh, sure I know.

Same old McGee. Well, I've got to be getting along, Bob. Good day. Goodbye, Mr. Neistafee. Well, so long. So long. Oh, wait a minute, Mr McGee. Don't forget about old Charlie. Oh, Charlie? It's next week.

Oh, well, so long. So long. Who's old Charlie? That's me. I think he's a stand-in for the invisible man. Who in Tunkett is that? Say, I got an idea, Molly. Next time we meet him, you accidentally knock his head off his head, and when I pick it up, I'll sneak a look at the initials inside of it.

Yeah. I have to do it. Or you could knock him unconscious and take an impression of his bridge work. That had really be something. Hey, look, Molly. Molly, there's somebody waiting for us on our porch.

Oh, looks like a police man. Why, it's my own pal, Officer Kelly. Oh, Mickey. Mickey and I did so. All the things to be praised. Oh, I thought you were drawn for sure enough. Is that a drow?

Round. Why, we just fished his clothes out of the river. My clothes? Yes, your blue term suit. Oh. Look, I brought it with me a hiriar, Mickey. Thank the officer, dearie. Huh? Oh. Oh. Thanks, Kelly.

Oh! Happenly, days, what's that? Oh, it's just the emergency squad. Dynamite the river for your husband. I better run down and tell him the quits are slimmed! Sign up! The way this suit keeps crawling home, I'm beginning to think there's ants in these pants.

See, I've got an idea. Why don't you just mail them to somebody? You don't know. I'm all fed up. I know what I'll do. I'll toss it over into Gilder's sleeves yard. There. His dog will take care of it all, right?

Oh, good. That's the end of that. Come on, let's go in the house, Molly. Now, I don't want to hear another word about that suit. That dreaded suit's a closed book in my life. Understand?

Yes, it is. Now, where's my paper and my slippers? I'll get them right away. And while you're about it, see if there's any apples in the cooler. All right. Vigee! Vigee! That sounds like Gilder's sleeve.

Come in. Oh, hi, Gilly. Oh, look here, McGee. I won't pay it. What you all excited about? You won't pay what? You can't hold me up for an exorbitant sum just because my dog chewed up your suit.

Oh, oh, you're... You're... your dog chewed up my suit, ain't you? Yeah, I just came out for breath of air and there was my great-dained hamlet eating your suit with relish. What, no mustard? The thing that Hamlet would turn out to be a bad actor.

And look at that suit, Molly. Yeah. Torn the shreds. Oh, dear old man. Oh, maybe the coat can be saved. Here, I'll try it on. Oh, dear, look. Look at that coat, Molly. Ah, beautiful.

Why, it's terrible. Oh, it's all my beautiful, new blue search. Ruen! Now look here, Gilda Sleepe! Oh, McGee, don't be bitter. I'll do the right thing, bio. Well, I think... Will you, Gilly? Well, that's mighty nice of you, Gilly.

Yes. Now, let's see. What can I do? Oh, I have it, McGee. My employees gave me a $50 merchandise order for Christmas. Oh. I'm gonna sign it over to you, McGee. Oh, that ought to be enough, eh?

Oh, too much. That's enough, Molly. Oh here you are, McGee. Now that makes everything alright between us doesn't it? Sure, Gilly. And you won't sue. No, I won't sue. Well, good-bye, Gisley. Goodbye. I'm going to get rid of this suit once and for all, Molly.

I know what I'll do, I'll throw it in the fireplace. There goes the pants. There goes the coat. There's the coat. There it goes. And the first thing tomorrow, I'm going downtown and get fitted out for a nice new suit. I think I'll get a blue search.

And what store is the order on? Well, let's see. It says right here. Oh, oh, let me shut down, Molly. I'm not feeling very good. How did you ask me, Molly? I said, what store is the order on?

Oh, I don't know. Why not? It's in my pocket. Well, take it out. It's in the other pocket. What other pocket? In the other suit. What other suit? I burned up! Vibber and Molly will be back in just a moment.

In the meanwhile, there's just time for me to say a few words about the traffic areas in your home. In every city there are certain streets that get more traffic than others. In your home there are certain floor areas too that get the heaviest traffic.

Hallways, entrances to certain rooms like the dining room and kitchen. These heavy traffic spots need more care than the rest of your floors. floors to keep the finishes from becoming badly scuffed and scraped. When floors are protected with genuine Johnson's wax, these were spots can be touched up as often as necessary without rewaxing the entire floor.

This is a great advantage not only in saving work, but in keeping your floors and your home beautiful. It's only one of the many advantages of using genuine Johnson's wax. This double-purpose wax polish protects and beautifies nearly everything in your home.

furniture, woodwork, leather goods, window sills, refrigerators. There are 100 extra labor-saving uses listed right on your package of genuine Johnson's wax, paste or liquid. Worryed about that old blue-third suit? No, I'm just trying to remember who that guy is we keep meeting all the time.

Oh, you still can't remember his name. Oh, and you know what I bet, Molly? Why? I bet he turns out to be some guy I went all through school with. He couldn't be the only one.

You didn't go all through school. I didn't? No. Good night. Good night, half. This is Harlow Wilcox. Speaking for the makers of Johnson's Wags and Johnson's self-funishing, blow coat race racing in Wisconsin, and landing you all to join us again next to us tonight at the same time.

Good night. This is the National Board of Trusting Government.