Crime Wave

Another cup of Maxwell House Coffee George. Sure. Pour me a cup, Gracie. You know Maxwell House is always good to the last. Ooh! Drop. And that drops good, too. Yes, it's Maxwell House Coffee Time, starring George Burns and Gracie Allard.

With yours truly, Bill Goodwin, the music of Meredith Wilson and his orchestra. Our happy postman, Mel Blank, Elliot Lewis and Robert Bence. For your Thursday night comedy enjoyment, it's George and Gracie. And for your everyday coffee drinking enjoyment, it's Maxwell House, the coffee that's always good to the last drop.

It's breakfast time as we look in at the Burns' home today, and George and Gracie are looking at the morning paper. My goodness, George, did you read this? Some burglars saw through a man's door and took everything in his house.

Yeah, there's really a crime way. Anyway, every day you read about more burglaries and robberies. Oh, George, why don't you ask Bill Goodwin to move in with us? Why? Well, I'd feel safer with a man around the house.

How about me? Yeah, you'd be safer too. Thanks, but I can protect both of us. Well, George, if you won't let Bill Goodwin move in, let's go down to the pet shop and get a watchdog.

I'll feel safer if I have protection. But honey, when you've got me, you've got protection. I'm just the same as a dog. What's your job? That's the first time you've ever agreed with my mother.

Let's go to the pet shop. Oh, here we are, George. How does a pet shop? How do you do? May I help you? Well, yes, I want to look over your supply of dogs. Five dogs.