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Beauty Mark

Burns and Allen · February 16, 1943 · 27 min · 3,715 words

The transcript of “Beauty Mark”, an episode of Burns and Allen first broadcast February 16, 1943. Press a time to play from that line (a 60-second preview; Potato Plus plays it all). The Burns and Allen Show plays Burns and Allen free, live around the clock. Search inside this transcript.

Machine transcript (may contain errors).

Transcript

Bill Goodwin speaking for Lever Brothers, makers of Swan, the new white floating soul. Well, it's Tuesday night again. Time for another pleasant visit with George Burns and Gracie Allen, their guest, Veronica Lake, Jimmy Cash, and Paul Whiteman and his music.

And now meets the people who live in the Burns House. George and Gracie. What are you doing, sweetheart? Riding a lot of the, mother? No, I'm riding a wedding announcement. A wedding announcement? Listen, it seems it sounds right.

Mr. and Mrs. Samuel J. Saggrail. Take pleasure in announcing the forthcoming marriage of their daughter, Tootsie, to Mr. William Goodwin. The ceremony will be held. Wait a minute. Bill Goodwin is going to marry Tootsie Seidwell?

That's right. I don't believe it. But it's true, George. Of course it's a secret. Very few people know about it yet. Not even Bill. I thought so. What horrible thing are you cooking up for that poor guy?

Is it so horrible to marry a girl who looks exactly like Veronica Lake? Gracie, Tootsie has a face like a New England boiled dinner. She doesn't look like Veronica Lake. But she will be here. Professor Robinson will fix that.

Who? Professor Hubble Robinson. Hubble Robinson? Yes. A beauty expert. He tells the beauty kids guarantee he can make people look like their favorite movie star. Oh, for a Pete's sake. So, touchy decided on Veronica Lake and we're going to get started today.

How long do you expect it will take? Oh, just a couple of hours. Veronica's a very small girl, you know. Gracie, you're wasting your time. This Professor Robinson must be a quack. He's nothing of the thought, George.

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