Burns and Allen · December 16, 1941 · 30 min · 1,649 words
The transcript of “Mailing A Christmas Package”, an episode of Burns and Allen first broadcast December 16, 1941. Press a time to play from that line (a 60-second preview; Potato Plus plays it all). The Burns and Allen Show plays Burns and Allen free, live around the clock. Search inside this transcript.
Machine transcript (may contain errors).
What way do you have? Makers of Swan on the new white floating soap that take way better than old style floating soap. Here's Paul Whiteman, Sir Bill Goodwin, singing gay Ranchero. Martha, the new- I hope you like it here, Martha.
George, that's my husband. He's very easy to please, and he says I'm very simple too. I know how I can hear them. Ha! Well, that's a good girl. How old are you, Martha? Just 17, ma'am.
Oh, my, that's young. But of course, when I was 17, I wasn't any older than you are. It ain't a very fancy cut. No, you're not. I have an honesty. Oh, everybody says my stare at their goods, but that's nice.
And it's important to be healthy, too. By the way... Oh, I'll answer with Martha. You found just like my sister Vessy. Oh, you are my sister Vessy. Ah, well now guess who this is? Before I get this hat off?
Well, that's Papa. You remember the first time Josh came to dinner at our house. Papa said to him, Mr. Burns, you intend to remain single, or would you like another piece of roast beef? I'm sorry, engagement immediately.
Ha ha ha. Let me, but you can't be so choosy. You'll be 26th, only a few more years. Honestly? Papa gave you three presents? What were they? Oh, a hope chair? A bridal veil and a bear craft.
Stasia, cook and I'd like to know if Mr. Burns likes lots of seasoning in his food. Oh, by all means, Martha. So when you wash the vegetables, you should have used plenty of bath salts.
Yes, ma'am. You go right ahead with your work, Martha. I'm going in to see if Herman is through with his lunch. I told George to oil that kitchen door. Hello, Herman. I'll finish with you lunch, Herman.
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