Cap'n Crunch's Sweet Tooth (commercial, 1965)

Alright, crew. Swimming period is over. Up anchor. Full sail, ho! And all that kind of thing. Oh, dearie me. Sharks, if there were only some way you could reason with them. Not now, Carlisle. Mm-hmm.

Say, sweet tooth. I get it. Uh, sharks. Attention, please. There, try a little of my new sugar sweet, Captain Crunch cereal, instead of sea dogs. Notice how it stays sugar-sweet and crunchy in seawater? Although most of us feel that it's even tastier in milk.

Captain Crunchy is the crunchiest cereal of them all. Oh, sorry, Sea Dog. That's right, crew. You're safe now. Once anyone's tried sugar-sweet, Captain Crunch, they prefer it to everything else. Besides, it's named after me.