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Vintage TV Commercials

Commercial · Don't Touch That Dial shorts · 1969 · 38 min · 4,240 words

The transcript of “Vintage TV Commercials”, an episode of Don't Touch That Dial shorts from 1969. Press a time to play from that line (a 60-second preview; Potato Plus plays it all). Don't Touch That Dial plays Don't Touch That Dial shorts free, live around the clock. Search inside this transcript.

Machine transcript (may contain errors).

Transcript

This diner is pulling a switch on the regulars by serving New Instant Maxwell House. What's it taste like? Coffee, that's what it tastes like. New Instant Max, now a better blend of coffee beans freshly perked for more fresh perked taste.

We call it the Perky Instant. The success of the recent Apollo space flights. Man has been brought another step closer to the moon. Abort these man-to-pollo flights, three astronauts, and with them, Tang, Tang, the energy breakfast drink with rich natural flavor and more vitamin C than orange juice.

Still, Tang's biggest role isn't a NASA space program. It's right here on Earth. Volkswagen's square backs of hand holds just about twice as much stuff as you can stuff into the trunk of a Nortoneri sedan. And when you come to the end, always the other end.

Alka sells the tablets in a glass of water and you see the bubbles. Bubbles, they're your friends. Swimming around the glass, they provide a relaxing, entertaining show. But what they do best, they do inside your stomach. The bubbles, along with the alkalizers, help relieve that stuffy feeling, that bloated, blah feeling. They sue and they comfort you. That's the bubbles for you.

Ten college girls volunteered to test meat against shaving. They shaved one leg. But on the other, they creamed hair away with neat. As this nylon stocking dramatizes, days later on seven out of ten, the shaved legs showed coarse bristly stubble, while the neat legs showed hardly a trace of hair.

Felt silky smooth. Get neat. Keeps your legs silky smooth days longer. Silky smooth, neat. Somewhere back at the dawn of history, man discovered roast duck. Man's next discovery, the Stubby stomach. Centuries will pass before he discovers something to unstub it.

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