Roto-Rooter (radio spot, 1979)

The rutor presents... The raving. Once upon a midnight jury, while I pondered weak in weary over many acquaintance, curious volume of forgotten lore, while I nodded in the hushing suddenly the kimmer rushing as if someone slowly flushing water across my chamber floor.

Only this and nothing more. Eagerly I wished the moral vainly I had sought to borrow plunges to relieve my sorrow mops to dry the soggy floor, I slowed it down and nothing more. Ankle deep in water, standing long I stood there wheezing, panting, weeping, cursing, cursing that no mortal ever cursed before, as the mess was slow subsiding.

My thoughts were strong to go arriving to dry my troubled clothes, perhaps to find a liquor store. I jumped, stried my motor scooter, a big black bird screamed, Roto-Rooter! And away go troubles down the drain!

Ah yes, Roto-Rooter, why didn't I think of that before? Their more comfort, never more. Thank you.