Joyce Wallace

The property presents Dick Powell as Richard Diamond, Private Detective. Oh, calm down, baby. Take it easy. It's all right now. Hey, what's going on in here? We'll get a doctor to step on it. Yeah, okay.

Joyce, Joyce. If you keep on like this, you'll end up sleeping in a cage. Joyce, when you shut up and listen to me. Okay, honey, sorry. Here's another exciting half hour with Richard Diamond, Private Detective.

Starring Dick Powell. Diamond Detective Agency, anything for the home, reconditioned V2 bombs complete with built-in seat for your mother-in-law's next trip. Also a large stock of five second hand grenades for the kiddies in the block.

Oh, by the way, we have a special today. Yes, with every five tonne purchase of dynamite, you get free of charge, a nifty nitro tank to destroy your kit. Great for parties, plant one in your driveway and give you a relative that extra lift.

Richard, die. Yes. Oh, you're terrible. Oh, now you only say that because you're an authority on the subject. It's a... Oh honey, maybe I've been trying too hard. This week, clients have been as scarce as lobsters on the Sahara.

Oh, no business at all. Helen, if a client walked in now, I'd probably fall off the chair. Mr. Dunn. Just being as good as my word, dear. Can I give you a hand? No, what else do you want to get rid of?

Rick, what happened? Oh, someone just walked in. And you fell? Yeah, right on... Uh-uh, Rick. I'll talk to you later. Bye. Bye. What can I do for you, dear? My name is Joyce Wallace. I want to hire you.