The Football Gameliz Iris

It's time for my favorite husband starring Lucille Ball. Yes, it's the gay family series starring Lucille Ball with Richard Denning as Lizz and George Cooper. Two people who live together and like it. As we look in on the little town of Sheridan Falls, it's morning.

And Iris Atterberry is coming up the walk of the Cooper home at 3.21 Bundy Drive. Suddenly she gets a horrified look on her face and starts running up the steps. What's the matter? Shuffle windows, call the police.

There's a bear in your backyard. A bear? He must escape from the zoo he's standing right in the middle of the yard, pulling the air. There's goodness, a bear in a... That's no bear. It isn't?

No, football season is here. I'm airing Georgia's raccoon cold. What a relief. Let me sit down. Oh, I shouldn't have run so hard. I read your heart. No, it's not to bone in my corset.

But the real pain is thinking of football season and those two juvenile idiots we're married to. I just got a mental picture of them in their official costume. Raccoon coke, rutorscaps, cowbells and ukulele. Please, I haven't had breakfast yet.

Well, George is going to look different this year anyway. I found something wonderful and I'm going to go over his raccoon coat with it. What is it? An electric razor. Oh. You wouldn't dare. No, I'm yellow.

Yeah, I guess there's no fighting at least. When's a homecoming football game? This weekend. No, no. This is Z-Day minus three. And I have big news for you, Iris. I'm not going. Oh! Do you realize what you're saying, girl?

I certainly do. I might endure having my feet frozen in a windy stadium, and I could possibly struggle through those stupid card stunts at half time. But I'll be darned if I'll march in another torchlight parade wearing Georgia pajamas.