Hillbilly

The makers of Bluebonnet Margarine and Tenderleaf tea present the Fred Allen show. With Fred's guest Frank Sinatra, Portland Hoffa, Minerva Fire's Mrs. Nussbaum, Alan Reed as false staff open shore, the Tenderleaf workshop players, the Demarcos sisters, and Al Goodman and his orchestra.

And to the lady who sent me the anonymous fan letter, my name is Kenny Delmar. This week, ladies and gentlemen, our victorious naval forces have been coming home on battleships, cruisers, and carriers. Tonight another flat-top has just arrived and here he is, Fred Allen!

Thank you and good evening ladies and gentlemen. Well Kenny, I hope you are celebrating the fleet's return. Oh yes Fred, well New York has gone all out to welcome the Navy. Oh I know last night they had 80 men rocking the Asta hotel to make the sailors feel at home who were sleeping.

And in that pictured music hall you know weekend at the Waldorf, they took out Walter Pigeon and put in a seagull just for the Navy. I wish some of the Navy had come into laugh at these jokes.

You know. Well, uh, it wasn't Jack Benny in the Navy, Fred. Jack Benny in the Navy. Oh, that was before water was even invented. They had the H, but they were waiting for the two O's to come out of the Arc and those things.

You know that Benny is the only sailor I know who can get seasick looking at a bundle of wet wash. Benny was in the only naval engagement of the Civil War. Oh, you mean the monitor and the Murrimack?

Benny was on the monitor. When the lookout yelled, Oh, hoi, the merry Max's stern. Benny said, have them sing something. You think it would have worked better with four chicks in the chakra? You know, Benny...