Archie the Hypnotist

It's Duffy's Tavern, the Friday Night transcribed feature on NBC's All-Star Festival of Comedy, Music, Mystery and Drama, brought to you by the makers of Aniston, where fast relief from pain of headache, neurotus, neurology, by RCA Victor, world leader in radio, first in recorded music, first in television, and by Chesterfield, the cigarette that has for you mildness with no one pleasant aftertaste,

the cigarette that brings you Bing Crosby and Bob Hope. And now, here we go, friends, to Duffy's Tavern. With Arthur's creature, Bird Gordon is the mad Russian, Martha Sleeper, Hazel Sherman is Miss Duffy, and starring Archie himself, Ed Gardner.

Hello? Duffy's beverage imporium. Where the elite forget her to sup. Teacher of the Mitch D. speaking, Duffy is not in the vicinity. Oh hello Mr Duffy. Big pardon? What am I doing here? I'm here on the recommendation of my psychiatrist.

I've always been a butler in the movies and he thought I needed a change of atmosphere. So instead of being a gentleman's gentleman, I am now a bum's bum. That is correct. Well, Archie, well, he's very visibly occupied at the moment.

What? Oh, very well. I'll wake him up. Don't be a wise guy, Treach. Give me that phone. Hello, Duppy. Huh? How come Treach is working here? Well, I figured we could use a tall waiter, you know, who could hold the tray high enough so the customers can't see what they're eating before it explodes in their stomachs.

I-I'm coming no way to when I had to let you as your panious lavnica. I caught the crook stealing from the cash register. I do it all the time. I know, but with me it's different.