The Big Event - The Law of Averages

Being an old research man myself with an advertising agency named Blair Thomas and Kane, I once looked up the source of that old chestnut about coming events casting their shadows before. It's from a rather obscure poem called Lockiel's Warning by an English poet named Thomas Campbell.

I've used the quotation many times, but actually you never know what shadow is foretelling what event. I know I didn't have the slightest inkling that I was in for the biggest event in my life when Dr. Johnson said to me.

Well, as a matter of fact, since midnight, every baby that's been born in the hospital has been a boy. The CBS Radio Workshop, dedicated to man's imagination, the theatre of the mind. Today, the big event, a fantasy for radio by Gloria Dapper and Draper Lewis.

A fantasy about the law of averages, and the day the law of averages ran out. It may seem like ancient history going over that day now, but everyone else has had a chance to tell what happened to them, so why shouldn't I?

I was in the waiting room of the maternity ward of a hospital when it all started. There were four or five other guys sweating it out with me. We'd been there most of the night. It was close to 1.30 in the morning.

But it wasn't quiet like it usually is at that time in a hospital. Mr. Blair, my boss, had arrived around 10 to keep me company. At least that was his excuse for bending my ear for three solid hours.

I kept saying to him, uh, look, Mr. Blair, you don't have to bother waiting with me. It may be hours before anything happens. It's my pleasure, Danny, my complete pleasure. Now just relax, old EC Blair is quarterbacking us play.