Stupid Potato

Transcripts › Burns and Allen

Deciding How To Spend Summer Vacation

Burns and Allen · May 29, 1947 · 29 min · 3,554 words

The transcript of “Deciding How To Spend Summer Vacation”, an episode of Burns and Allen first broadcast May 29, 1947. Press a time to play from that line (a 60-second preview; Potato Plus plays it all). The Burns and Allen Show plays Burns and Allen free, live around the clock. Search inside this transcript.

Machine transcript (may contain errors).

Transcript

Another couple Maxwell House Coffee George. Well, sure. Pull me a cup, Gracie. You know Maxwell House is always good to the last. Groom! Drop. And that drops good, too. Yes, it's Maxwell House Coffee Time, starring George Burns and Gracie Allen.

With yours truly filled good, when the music of Meredith Wilson and his orchestra, Mel Blank and our guest, Francis Langford. For your Thursday night comedy enjoyment, it's George and Gracie. And for your everyday coffee drinking enjoyment, it's Maxwell House.

Expertly blended and radiant roasted for rich, mellow, extra flavor. Maxwell House, the coffee that's always good to the last drop. Well tonight, ladies and gentlemen, George and Gracie do their final broadcast of the current season.

So for 13 weeks, you won't be hearing from Radio's most charming comedian and most talented actor. But Gracie and I will be back in September. So will Gracie's husband. Meanwhile, let's look in at the Burns home where George and Gracie are figuring out where to spend their vacation.

And I did that it feels to George as the big automobile race in Indianapolis. You know where I'd like to be tomorrow, Gracie, Indianapolis. Indianapolis. Indiana. Well, now, where do you want to be? Indianapolis or Indiana?

Indianapolis is in Indiana. Oh, well, that makes it handy. You can visit both of them in one trip. Yes. Well, anyway, that's where I'd like to go tomorrow to see the big race. Oh, well, it's just as well you won't be there, George. You'd lose. You'd bet on the wrong horse.

They race automobiles. Oh, well, then you'd be sure to lose. Horses can't run as fast as automobiles. They don't use horses. Men run the automobiles around a track. Well, now that's the silliest thing I ever heard. Men can't even run as fast as horses.

Read the full transcript with Potato Plus

76 more paragraphs, about 27 more minutes of the episode. Potato Plus is every episode on demand from any moment, every transcript in full and unlimited transcript search, for $5 a month.

Potato Plus opens soon: join the list

All Burns and Allen transcripts · Search every transcript · The archive