Finishing School

Swan, the new white floating soap that's pure as fine casteels brings you George Burns and Gracie Allen. In this one, Ted, the music of Felix Mills and yours truly Harry Bonzel. And now meet the people who live in the Burns House, George and Gracie.

Well, it's morning in the Burns home and George comes downstairs with a happy song on his lips. Never dreaming that in the den Gracie is holding a special meeting of that horror of all horrors, the Beverly Hills Uplift Society.

Give me land, lots of land, under starry skies above Of old old don't, fence me in Oh Gracie! Maybe she's in the den Oh, I forgot I just came in and I Oh, no Fenced in Well, I'll see about that Gracie, come out here Oh, er, come in there Good morning, sweetheart Don't get morning me. You promised that the uplifters wouldn't meet here anymore.

Now get those old hands out of here. Old hands? Why, to look at them, you'd say they were girls in the 20s. They may have been girls in the 20s, but this is the 40s.

Now, get them out of here. But, George, this is a special meeting. We've got to finish it. What makes it so special? It's so special. Well, remember Tootsie Saggwell? That homily man, Chaser? I'll say I do.

Well, hadn't you noticed that she's been away for quite a while? Yeah, I thought she'd been drafted. No, no. The girls of the club decided that she must get a husband, so we raised a fund.

The Tootsie Saggwell while there's life, there's hope fund. What did you do with it? Well, we sent Tootsie to a finishing school. That won't help her, any? Why, it... she... It looks like she'll ever get a man.