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Till the Cows Come Home

Burns and Allen · April 3, 1940 · 29 min · 4,662 words

The transcript of “Till the Cows Come Home”, an episode of Burns and Allen first broadcast April 3, 1940. Press a time to play from that line (a 60-second preview; Potato Plus plays it all). The Burns and Allen Show plays Burns and Allen free, live around the clock. Search inside this transcript.

Machine transcript (may contain errors).

Transcript

Hello, my friends. The Heinz, Sonny and Ammon, preem program. What were crazy for? What were crazy? What were crazy for? What were crazy for? What were crazy? I'm George Burns, and Heinz, Sonny, Gracey Allen, with Frank Parker, Ray, Noble, and his orchestra, and Truman Bradley speaking.

Oh, I've been here in the song. That's right, you can't go wrong. What were crazy? He's voting all day. Thank you very much. Hello. How did you camp in? Come along. All fine. Only I've been getting a little indentation with Congress.

Empatients with Congress? Yeah, where do they come off passing a law that you can only spend $3 million for your campaign fund? I saw that on the front page this morning. Did you see the second page?

Uh-huh. How did they pay to make that? He escaped again. Oh, good. $3 million for a campaign fund. Well, where can you go on that? Why, they spend more than that to run the government.

Grisly, stop worrying. The Republicans and the Democrats are limited to $3 million, too. Yeah, but those Jim Paul, he has to send $17 for a permanent. Well, I wouldn't know. And does Mr. Donna have to pay $10 for a snooze?

Well, you've got me. You've got me. And does Honey or Louis have to send $3 to have his eyebrows plucked? Well, you've got me. I really would... You know what's wrong with this program? You've got me.

You're guessing. You were tricked... I was picked into... Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. The $3 million, Grace, he's enough to run any camp. Oh, yeah? Why, the last convention I went to, I wasn't even running and it cost me $10,000 for tip.

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