Sailing Day

We are about to go abroad with the Lockhart's. Mr. and Mrs. Lockhart are taking a trip to Europe. That is, Mrs. Lockhart is taking Mr. Lockhart. As you probably know, Mr. Lockhart represents the average type of businessman.

Blunt, comfortable, noses own mind, enjoys his business and community, and would much rather have gone fishing. Mrs. Lockhart represents the pleasant type of housewife, belongs to the Women's Club and the literary club of her town and still retains the spirit of romance.

We listen in on them as they arrive at the pier in New York on sailing days. Here we are dear. Yes, here we are, but where are we? At the pier, dear, on our way to Europe, just think of it.

I don't want to think of it. Now, dear, don't be so grumpy. Remember, you've taken this trip to please me. I can't forget it. Very well, then. And I hope you won't. Of course not, dear.

And I'm not grumpy, I'm just wondering. Wondering? Wondering what? Wondering why people ever go to Europe, when the government charges them to leave this country and other countries charge them to get into there. Oh, now dear, please don't stop on that passport trouble again.

And when you've got to show birth certificates, marriage certificates... Yes, but dear, it's only... And get a magistrate to vouch for your good characters... Yes, darling. And after you produce a clean bill of health and morals, They put a photograph of you in your passport that makes you look like a crook and a gunman.

But dear, will you listen? Well... Everyone has to go through that beer and after all it's only red tape. That's the best thing you've said today. It really doesn't mean anything. That's just what makes me mad. I feel as if I'd been gone over with a microscope.