Out of the Fire into the Frying Pan (The Prize Hog Bodyguard)

Mrs. Perkins won the prize, but I got in the biggest pickle at the County Fair. This is another in the adventures of America's fabulous freelance insurance investigator, Johnny Dollar. At insurance investigation, Johnny Dollar is only an expert.

At making out his expense account, he is an absolute genius. Expanse accounts submitted by special investigator Johnny Dollar. Two, home office, Corinthian liability and bonding company, terminal building, Hartford, Connecticut. The following is an accounting of my expenditures during my assignment as bodyguard to Grand Blue Ribbon Champion, spotted Poland-China hog, Rosie Baron of Iowa.

Or how you cast my pearls of wisdom before swine. or out of the fire into the frying pan. Spence account item one, $76.80, train and bus fare Hartford to the town of Carver, county seat of Carver County, Iowa.

Spence account item two, 250, one Coke, three handkerchiefs, a bottle of stall, tablets, and sunglasses, with which to combat the corn bell heat. Item three, six bits, jittney ride to the Carver County Fairgrounds. Undoubtedly named that because the band I found in the midst of playing its afternoon concert was only fair.

Hey, uh, uh, friend. How's that? I'm looking for a pig named Rosie Barron of Iowa. Tell me where I'll find his cage. Hey, they don't keep her alone, okay? Rollo? Rosie. Well, that's short for Rosie Barron of Iowa.

Oh, yeah, yeah, any fool would know that. Uh-huh. Can you tell me where he is? See that building over there, the livestock building? Yeah. You'll find Rala in the swine wing. Swine wing? Well, that conjures up a dainty picture of flying pig.

Ah, fried Rala won't ever do much flying, weighs 980. Oh, well, thanks a lot. Ah, no neighbor. Yeah? Why don't you try slipping out of that there coat? You won't find it near or sweaty.