Christmas Present

How brings you the life of Riley. The shampoo that removes unsightly dandruff in its little ass three minutes and leaves hair radiantly clean, radiantly lovely, presents the life of Riley with William Van Dix and Riley.

How Christmas Day has come and gone and there are now reposes in the Riley living room a very special gift. Just how this particular package from Santa Claus came to be there is quite a story.

A story that began three days before Christmas. Junior, what are you gonna get, Mother, for Christmas? See, I wish I knew, Babs. I'm stuck. What are you getting at? I don't know either. Mother needs so many things.

What do you think, Daddy? Well, why don't you ask your mother? I think this business of surprising people with gifts is a lot of poppy rocks. What is? Oh, hello, Dumplin. I was just saying it's such a nuisance trying to figure out what to buy people for Christmas.

It's much better to ask them what they want and get it. Why surprise them? That's what I'm doing this year. Peg, what do you want for Christmas? I'd rather be surprised. No, no, no. Let's be practical.

Now, come on. Tell me, what's the one thing you want me to buy you? A mean coat. You're going to be surprised. Now, I think half the fun with Christmas presents is not knowing what you're getting.

I guess you and your right. Well, sure. It's fun, but you get such useless stuff, like last Christmas, Peg. It's very sweet of your father to surprise me, but frankly, what good is that present to me?

Well, let's see now. What did Papa send you? Pera wooden shoes. They're soon still laying on my closet. Daddy, they were shoe trees. You thought they put them in your shoes? Well, how I get my feet in?