Vanity Fair

But before we begin, dear listeners, let me warn you of two things. First, that this is a story without a hero. Second, that vanity fair is, its name indicates, a very vain, wicked, foolish place, full of all sorts of humbug and falseness and pretensions, as you will soon see for yourselves.

As we bring our characters forward, I will ask leave, not only to introduce them, but occasionally to step down from the platform and talk to you about them, if they're good and kindly to love them and shake them by the hand.

They're wicked and heartless to abuse them in the strongest terms which politeness admits of and also to laugh at them cadentially in the listener's sleeve. For it was to combat and expose such as these no doubt that laughter was made.

Old chick June 15, 1813, madam, after her six years resident to the Pickerton Academy for young ladies, I have the honor and happiness of presenting Miss Amelia Sedley to her parents as a young lady not on worthy to occupy a fitting position in their polished and refined soul. Those virtues which characterise the young English gentleman, those accomplishments which become her birth

and station, will not be found wanting in the person of Miss Sedlech. Though in geography there is still much to be desired. In music and dancing, in orthography, in every variety of embroidery and needlework, she will be found to have realised her friends fondest wishes. In leaving the picket in academy for young ladies, Miss Sedle carries with her

the hearts of her companions and the affectionate regards of her mistress who has the honour to to subscribe to our madam your most humble servant, Barbara Pinkerton. If yes, Miss Rebecca Sharp and often accompanies Miss Sedley.