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The Joke's on Us

Gunsmoke · February 9, 1958 · 18 min · 2,172 words

The transcript of “The Joke's on Us”, an episode of Gunsmoke first broadcast February 9, 1958. Press a time to play from that line (a 60-second preview; Potato Plus plays it all). Gunsmoke plays Gunsmoke free, live around the clock. Search inside this transcript.

Machine transcript (may contain errors).

Transcript

In the territory on West, there's just one way to handle the killers and the spoilers, and that's where the U.S. Marshall and the fellow guns smoke. Then it's by army and your magazine. The softly featured magazine for the useless soldier and civilian.

Gun move smoke, starring William Conrad. The story of the violence that moved West with young America. And the story of a man who moved with it. I'm that man. Matt Dillon, United States Marshall. The first man they look for and the last they want to meet.

It's a chance they job, but it makes a man watchful. Go bring his horse over here, Benson. Sure, Jake. And wait until we get him up on his horse. Before you tie that rope to a vial, there'd be too much slack otherwise.

Fine. We couldn't hang you very good with your feet touching the ground. Good, we too, man. No, Jake, you couldn't. We've been neighbors long time, Silmer. If I could figure some way to make it easy for you, I'd do it.

That's all right. You get to hang and I could put a bullet in you. I'd be beholden to you. Okay, I'll do it then. Then what'd you drop by and tell my wife on your way home, Jake?

Sure. I figured I'd do it not anyway. You know, I always liked you, children. It's gone too bad about this. Sure. There might have come for a man with a new surround, isn't it? You man got your mind, later.

We can't have no man stealing horses around here. None of us feel safe lesson we've caught them in the home of them. I reckon that feels the same way, Jake. Of course you would. You'd hang me just as fast if I'd done it. I would.

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