Mc Guire Splits the Atom

It's Duffy's Tavern brought to you transcribe by the National Broadcasting Company with Charlie Catter is Finnegan Hazel Sherman is Miss Duffy, Fatsby shown at the piano and starring Archie himself Ed Gardner Everybody hello Duffy's Tavern where the elite meat meat Archie the man just bacon Duffy ain't here. Oh, hello Duffy. What you doing?

Print the labels, Mark, do not open till Christmas. What for? You're gonna stick him across Mrs. Duffy's mouth. Well, uh, what's your fat-frown shootin' off a kisser about now? She's mad cause you missed your dinner.

How'd you miss it? You ducked when she threw it at you. Well, it sounds like a merry you, tight out your way. Huh? Why don't we doin' about Christmas? Christmas? Well, you know, the usual duffy. We put a magnifying glass on the bar.

Yeah, so that when the mice run by they look like reindeers. Yeah, we're full of Christmas spirits. We even hung a special notice on the wall. It says, if you must drink on Christmas Eve, be sure to drive your car. Sign Cavendish the undertaker.

Yeah, what a business man that came into the sheet. He just announced that each customer that's brought in during the holiday season will be wrapped as a gift. Which reminds me, Duffy, slippery Maguires coming down here tonight.

You still saw it because he sold you that vanishing cream for Mrs. Duffy? But Duffy, he didn't guarantee to make a vanish permanently. Look, Duffy, I denied it. Slippery is a crook. He's my pal and I'll brook no further on his behalf. Good day sir. Hey, Fats, you know, slippery Maguire is coming

down here tonight, so leave us layout to welcome Matt Ferment. We can't do it. Why not? He swiped it the last time he was here. Well, Fats, slip has reformed. The gang, a leopard can change his spots, can't he?