A Cat and a Match First Comic - Beetle Bailey

I'm the comic-weekly man, the jolly comic-weekly man, and I'm here to read the funnies to you happy boys and honeys. Yes, boys and girls, it's comic-weekly time, and here I come right into your house to bring a little fun and happiness.

Right out of the pages of Puck the comic-weekly, straight into your living room, your friend the comic-weekly man, the jolly comic-weekly man. Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello! Well, little Miss Sunny, how are you today? I know a little fine time!

Oh quick, what is the middle? What is the difference between a cat and a match? A difference between a cat and a match? Oh, that really is a... Mmm, a cat and a match! I'm afraid that doesn't strike a spark in my brain.

I give up, what is the difference between a cat and a match? A cat likes on his feet and a match likes on his head. Oh, that's very good. Thank you. Now you tell me one.

Alright, what's the difference between a sewing machine and a kiss? A sewing machine and a kiss? Uh-huh. I don't think I'll even try to work on this. I give up. What is the difference between a sewing machine and a kiss?

Well, a sewing machine so seems nice. And a kiss seems so nice. Oh, that's great for me. I'm glad you like it. Oh, I did. I did. Now, will you please read me the funny?

Puck the comic weekly. Very well, I'll read that in just a moment. But before I do, let's listen to this nice man. Now here we go with Puck the comic weekly. And on the first page of the first section, under bringing up father, Beetle Bailey.